24.03

Are you a ‘kindrovert’ too?

I am curious, are you an extrovert or an introvert? If you think you are neither, perhaps you are a ‘kindrovert’. I am.

I used to think I was an extrovert. I like people, and I loved performing on stage when I was young. Parties were fun and I’d happily talk to strangers. But then I got older and wasn’t so keen to be caught up in crowds. I had no desire to be the centre of attention, and I found large gatherings quite draining. As I paid more attention to my stress triggers, I realized I needed quiet time more and more. I clearly wasn’t an extrovert after all.

Then it became trendy to come out as an introvert, so I tried that label on for a while, but it didn’t fit either. I needed time and space away from the noise to recover, but my ideas would come to life in conversation.

So I looked for an alternative and I discovered that there is a middle way called an ‘ambivert’: a bit of extrovert, a bit of introvert, not really sure about either. From the moment I heard the word I didn’t want to be one. It sounded like some kind of cleaning product and felt like a manufactured option to describe the space on the spectrum between extrovert and introvert. It didn’t work for me.

I thought about when I am at my most energized and creative, fizzing with potential, and realized I come alive in small gatherings of kindred spirits: people who are both practical and spiritual, challenging and yielding, gentle and strong. People who are smart and funny, but not ‘in your face’. People who listen and share, but don’t try too hard. People who’d rather say nothing than talk about nothing, but come alive in real conversation. And I know I’m not alone.

So I invented a new label for myself: I’m a ‘kindrovert’, and I suspect you might be one too. Find out more about what it means to be a kindrovert, and what difference it makes when you know you are one, in this short video:

I’d love to know if you are a kindrovert too – let me know on social media using #kindrovert.

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