Take a moment and ask yourself when you last tried something completely new. Last year I started learning Japanese, and realised it was the first brand new skill I had tried since I was about 14. The last 22 years had been about just developing skills I already had. Who knows what I may be good at? Who knows what any of us are good or bad at unless we try? And how do you know what you love if you have never tried it?
“Learning is the discovery that something is possible” – Fritz Perls
I found Japanese a hugely interesting language. Of course it has its level of difficulty but I had learnt more in six months than I ever hoped. After always telling myself I was no good at learning languages I was proving myself wrong and at a time of my life when most do not. No longer did I ignorantly rely on everyone being able to speak English.
I cannot tell you how satisfying it was the day I had my first conversation in Japanese. I am sure my grammar was incorrect and even some of the words were in the wrong order but the most important thing of all was that the woman I was talking to understood me!
Towards the end of my stint in Kyoto I became acutely aware that I had made a prudent decision to study for six months and not a full year. I couldn’t take the speed of the course and the constant shukudai (homework). And I was starting to long for a little extra cash in my pocket. I had been immensely proud of living off very little for some time but… I do like some of the finer things that life has to offer. This was a discovery which will hopefully help me find the right balance to my life.
“It began in mystery, and it will end in mystery, but what a savage and beautiful country lies in between.” – Diane Ackerman
I rediscovered drawing whilst away. I would be lying if I said I had planned to draw more while away. The truth is I had forgotten I could draw, and more importantly I had forgotten how much I enjoyed it. And I stumbled back upon it quite by chance. My nephew had broken his arm so I decided I would send him a card from Japan. This was until I went shopping and discovered how expensive it would be. I was living on £12 ($20 US) a day – which included breakfast, lunch and dinner. The price of a card was not factored into this. So I decided to make my own at a fraction of the cost.
I bought some paper and drew a picture of a few superheroes on the front – Batman and Superman to be precise. I loved every moment. I didn’t move from my desk for nearly six hours. I could not remember the last time I gave so much care, attention and detail to something – probably not since I was about fifteen, 20 years ago! It did make me chuckle a little though. One thing I have never lost was my great enjoyment of comics.
Was it wrong that I, at the age of 35 loved cartoons and comics? No, of course not. Perhaps we all need to access the child in us a little more often. And I was certainly in the right place. Manga and Anime were huge in Japan!
I loved, love comics, graphic novels and all things superheroes (and still do). This obsession had been made more socially acceptable for a person of my age with the success of the Hollywood blockbuster films. Interestingly I considered why I needed any social acceptance of any sort?
My greatest discovery was to let myself make discoveries. Ignorance, lack of confidence, insecurities or even others should not prevent experiences which may well shape you and your life for a long time to come.
Below is a list of a few of the discoveries I made whilst away in Japan. Some were not what I was expecting:
- I love feeling fit and healthy, and need to be for my sanity
- I love cartoons/comics
- I also love decision making
- I like drawing and writing
- I think I am becoming a hypercondriac(!)
- I have been guilty of wasting my life
- I am not getting any younger
- I need a certain level of money (but not the amount I first thought)
- I like routine, I need a routine to my day
- I have responsibilities to others and not just myself
- I want to design and build a home
- I want to try and write my book
- I need to make one of my big ideas a reality
I am still working on these, but it is good to have my list to remind me when I drift a little. To ultimately find your answers you really do need to understand yourself, warts and all. I made a pledge to myself to find a way for my life to include as much of the list above as possible. The balance of items is key. I am the only person who can ensure I make the most of my discoveries and give myself the opportunities to continue to make them no matter how trivial the may seem.
When it’s time to die, let us not discover that we have never lived
I dare you to open your eyes and see what you discover about yourself…
